I have always felt that I am somehow different from everyone...my family, friends, peers etc. The truth is I have too much of my own opinion. I used to think that it is a disadvantage, but then I realised, why not make it a virtue and an advantage for me instead? So, this blog is my platform of my self expression. I take careful measures to express myself discretely and with tact, because I am still a pretty private person.
Maybe it is because of my genes. Hmmm...I easily fall in love with many forms of beauty that were created in this world, books, art, music, dance, comedy and many more. Sometimes I will be madly in love with a particular artist or song, sometimes just completely desert music and read lots of books. Sometimes I will ponder over a question: which one do I love most? But I always settle this question with the resolution that I will never choose one for the other but just enjoy the company of all these.
Even when I was in primary school, I knew deep down that I am an artsy fartsy person. I scored impressive marks in language subjects( I learned 3 languages when I was 7, Chinese, English and Malay). I participated in singing, drawing, writing, caligraphy, speech and poem recital competitions. My mother is a very talented singer and coached me during the training sessions for the singing competitions in school. I was an avid reader, and soon found out that I was quite alone in this love affair.None of my classmates read a lot, but still I used lots of my spare time, even during assembly time to read.
However, as I grew older, I became more and more uncertain of myself. Sometimes I felt that I am very talented in writing, but sometimes I made myself to believe that I am no good at all. When I was 13 or 14, I began reading loads of self-help books. I tried to solve my insecurity through reading subjects such as about confidence, about searching my purpose in life and also about happiness. But none of them had any evident effect on my life, I just felt more and more lost and helpless.
I could not explain or tell even my mother about this problem. It seemed huge and impossible to be solved. All I could do was sink into my own problem deeper and deeper.
But during this long break from college and every other aspect of my life, I read a book that helped me to pick up my confidence and also happiness again. I would not say that the previous problem that I have described as disappeared through time. Once in a while I still return to the feeling of helplessness and lose myself in the world of despair. But today it is different. I really want to walk out of this once and for all. And reap all the fortunes from it in order to help myself and others on this journey of resolution.
The Purpose of This Blog
The reason why I created this blog is to express myself as an artist, and also share my thoughts about life, personal development, funny stuff and wisdom. I don't really care if this blog became my source of income, because it is one of my personal goals. This is like a "starter-blog", although I've had a couple of trial blogs, which were not as successful as this.